Have you ever wanted to do something shocking just for the hell of it, just to see what would happen? Something silly for no real reason. Like, if I had a nice two-melon ass instead of a white-woman-peach butt, I'd like to go into a nudey bar some night, drop my drawers and lay a big ole' log right on the floor.Then I'd zip up my pants and walk out.
Bet that would raise a few eyebrows. Can you imagine what would happen after I'd left?
"Did you see that!?" "Dude! Some chick just took a crap on the floor!" "Nice ass!"
Of course, I'd never do that, mostly 'cause it's not fair to the person who'd have to clean it up. Also, I would have crusty butt, having not wiped. Makes me giggle to imagine it though.
Or what if I walked right into a men's rest room, stood in front of a urinal and whizzed. Hee hee.
I have less grandiose ideas too, ones that don't involve elimination... like licking a complete stranger's ice cream, or giving a speech with my skirt tucked into my panty-hose in back just to see if anyone would tell me.
One time Loon and I were fixing caramel apples in the kitchen and I noticed how the caramel looked JUST like earwax, so I got a q-tip and dipped it in, then went into the other room and started a conversation while I pretended to clean my ear. When the moment was right I pulled out the chunky q-tip, licked it, and went right on talking. Hee hee hee... of course, the people present knew me well enough to know something was up, but it was funny none-the-less.
Today I am all about hyphens, have you noticed?
Monday, June 24, 2002
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